Wednesday, April 30, 2008

"Next Life" by Woody Allen

In my next life I want to live my life backwards. You start out dead and get that out of the way. Then you wake up in an old people's home feeling better every day. You get kicked out for being too healthy, go collect your pension, and then when you start work, you get a gold watch and a party on your first day. You work for 40 years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You party, drink alcohol, and are generally promiscuous, then you are ready for high school. You then go to primary school, you become a kid, you play. You have no responsibilities, you become a baby until you are born. And then you spend your last 9 months floating in luxurious spa-like conditions with central heating and room service on tap, larger quarters every day and then Voila! You finish off as an orgasm!

I rest my case.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I've heard the same thing attributed to George Carlin. Any idea who said it first?

Johnny Rogers said...

i have no idea. i got this quote from a friend, but i am sure it wouldn't be hard to find.. i will check it out. i am sure if I google the quote it will show me an accurate result.

Rolling Stone


For more widgets please visit www.yourminis.com

Redskins News

Wizards News

PSU Football News